How To Stop Searching & Become Your Own Guru
Are you tired of searching and looking for external confirmation only to realize that it got you nowhere, except for feeling more confused and wondering than before? Welcome to this post that is intended to help you get out of the “search trap”. So many of us have been used to looking outside of ourselves for the answers, ideas, and solutions we seek but the harsh truth is searching externally, asking others, or Google sensei only gets us so far. It may be fun, we may come across a post, a video, or a thread on Reddit with the same question that we ask ourselves & then we have a dopamine kick. But as fast as we got it, as fast it drops, like the scream tower in amusement parks…
Others can only give you answers and advice based on their experiences and worldviews. I’m not against that completely. We can of course use external sources and work with people but when we trust these external resources more than we trust ourselves it becomes a problem. And this can have painful consequences: I have been there and in the end, I felt more confused than before since I was loaded/bombarded with all this information, yet I still found myself seeking… It was like an addiction, I’m pretty sure it was an addiction — I know it didn’t help me but I couldn’t stop in the hope that maybe there might be a chance that I could finally find what I sought after.
The more we search, the more we exhaust ourselves and don’t create the space for our wisdom to come through… The paradox (and hey, we live in a universe of paradoxes) is when we stop searching and drop into our being instead, the answers will naturally arise — not always as accurate as our minds want them to be but with practice you’ll get the hang of it.
One day you’ll eventually reach a point where you have no other option left but to turn inward.
Asking yourself and becoming your own guru is not an easy but simple process that can be practiced by anyone, anywhere, anytime.
(I like to do this from time to time when I have a tea or cacao ceremony — as you can see in the picture on the left-hand side) The practice in a nutshell:
Get comfortable, and make sure that you are undisturbed, free from distractions
Close your eyes, relax, take deep breaths, and get still
Feel this bigger part of you, your higher self that is always with you - where in your body is it located? (I feel it centered in my chest and solar plexus area)
Ask whatever you want to get answered, drop any expectations, and listen
Be patient and just be
This part I asked you to connect to is who you are beyond the ego mask and the human costume. This part is still, formless and infinite. It knows you better than anyone else. Even your desires stem from this part.
Now that you know this, it makes more sense to consult yourself (your true self) for whatever question you would like to get answered, right? From this level of awareness — best done in silence — ask yourself your question, or you can also ask for clarity in general (clarity is one of the best things to manifest, imo), or if there is a message you need to hear. Anything. If you like, you can also ask yourself mentally “how would it feel like to have already received the clarity and answers I need?” and enjoy the feeling that follows.
“Your true self is infinite and so is it’s wisdom.”
A direct and clear answer might not come right away. Sometimes not at all but don’t let this discourage you. An answer can come as a feeling and sometimes the ideas and downloads you “need” might come at the perfect timing. I invite you to let curiosity win over doubt.
This process — of moving from relying on the external to the internal takes practice, patience, and some time and that’s fine. We have been used to asking anyone or anything but ourselves for so long. Even being open and willing to make this shift is huge! — which I assume you are when reading this post. Be compassionate and patient with yourself. I know it can feel so scary at first but it only does because it is unfamiliar at first and what is unfamiliar is declared as uncomfortable by our ego. Anyway, the more you practice going within, the more familiar and thus the more comfortable it becomes. Everything was uncomfortable at first.
I also have a guided meditation to practice exactly this — so that you feel less alone and always have a tool at hand to support you on your journey in case your mind gets distracted easily. You can check it out here.
Moreover, what is cooler than having yourself as a source of wisdom? Imagine going about your day & life and making decisions, receiving answers, and being guided by your intuition — your inner compass?
A whole new level of independence and self-trust!
